Me and Melbourne…well…..we didn’t really get along so well.  I never really gave her a fair shot.  I mean, look how I favored Sydney.  Three whole weeks!! Melbourne only got 3 days out of me!  I don’t know why…I had only heard nice things about Melbourne – that it was much artsier and more European than Sydney, that it was one of the easiest places to live, that the people might be friendlier there….still, I just wasn’t turned on and only went because I felt I was close enough so I should see it.

When I landed in Melbourne Friday afternoon , my phone wasn’t working.  I couldn’t figure out why.  The Optus phone plan I had was telling me I needed to “recharge”, which in Australian means pay more.  I had checked my balance, but I paid more. Again.  And it still wouldn’t work.  I tried calling the only call it would let me make – to Optus.  They kept me on hold for a half hour and never picked up. The other problem I had was that the serviced apartment I rented for the weekend had no wi-fi.  So no phone, no computer. I decided to call it a night and deal with it in the morning.

Saturday morning I tried calling Optus again.  Finally got someone on the phone and after checking my account, she told me everything looked fine and I should shut the phone down and take the Sim card out for a full minute.  Then put it back in and reboot.  Well, I had nothing to pop out the Sim card holder with, so I used a corkscrew.  You know where this is going, right?  Got the Sim card out, waited a few minutes, put it back in.  Well, it wouldn’t go back in all the way.  Ugh. This is getting ugly.  Having no phone nor computer to search anything, I walked out to the street and asked random strangers where I might find an Optus store.  Found the store, handed them my phone and my story, and they couldn’t fix it. They said it looks like I damaged the phone.  Fuck.  Where is the Apple store?  Oh…not in the city – only at a mall about 20 minutes outside the city.  Are you kidding me??? No, dead serious.  But there’s a repair shop a few blocks away that might fix it.  Off I went to the repair shop. They tried, but failed.  $30 poorer, the taxi dropped me off at the mall and I went in search of the Apple store.  They’re all so helpful in there, but it was Saturday, and all their appointments were filled.  I literally looked at this poor girl and said, “Well I’m not leaving.  I need someone to help me with this phone.  I don’t live here, I just got here, I don’t know where I am or where I’m going.  I’m lost without my phone and I’m not leaving until someone helps me.”  She empathized with my situation and told me to hang on and she grabbed the manager who set me up instantly with someone.  So….I broke the phone. And when you break your own phone, it’s not carried under warranty.  I looked like I was about to cry, and the nice Apple guy says to me, “Don’t worry about it.  We’ll just give you a new phone.”  Really? “Yeah, really.  We’ll take care of it.”  I absolutely love Apple and at this moment I pictured Steve Jobs looking down from above with a halo over his head.  But then we realized that I have an American iPhone, not an Australian iPhone, so he would have to order the American model in. It would take 7 days.  I was leaving 2 days later!!!! Helppppp!! I cannot leave without a phone!!! I am lost!!!! I have no access to maps, no access to where I might eat, walk, go….I’m in a foreign country and I need my damn phone!!  Is this the most boring story you’ve ever read?  Well this is how I spent my entire day on Saturday. I spent $732 on a new iPhone5c that I can return within 2 weeks for a full refund.  In the meantime, they ordered in the American iPhone.  My cousin who lives in Melbourne will pick it up and overnight it to me in Shute Harbor, which I plan to be in by the time it arrives.  If anything goes wrong, I’m out $732.

Saturday night, I needed to eat and drink.  Went in search of a BAR WITH BAR STOOLS.  Having no luck, I spotted some normal looking women having a cigarette and approached them. “Excuse me, I don’t mean to interrupt, but I was wondering if you could help me find someplace to go.  I just got into Melbourne and I’m traveling alone, and it’s really hard to meet people so I’m looking for a bar that might have bar stools where I can talk to people.”  They were like, ” yeah sure, there’s quite a few good ones…” yada, yada, yada…3 minutes later they invited me to join them. Yesss!!

Heading out Saturday night.

I follow them through a non-marked plain glass door and down a set of stairs into this totally cool Japanese restaurant, Izakaya Den. Amazingggg food. And great company!  It was Daniella’s birthday and her one girlfriend and 3 guy friends were there to celebrate, and I was honored to join them!  Conversation and sake flowed…the party moved to Mamasita where we switched to Margheritas, and then Gianni (41) and I decided to keep the party going at Cherry Bar, a grunge rock club where I was double the age of everyone in there, and then on to another dance club where we again were old but laughing.  By 2pm I was spent, so I left him there and headed home.  Totally fun.

Sunday I took myself to Pellegrini’s Bar for lunch – had the best Ravioli Napolitean I have ever had in my life.  This place is a Melbourne Institution.  Looks like a diner on the inside and is run and owned by true-blood Italians from the old country. They know how to make sauce!!  Then I strolled down to Federation Square to see what was going on. The Australian Open starts Monday here in Melbourne, and there was a lot of tennis-related stuff going on. It was just a nice day, walked around a bit, and since I hadn’t had internet for 2 days, I parked myself at a bar where I could get wi-fi and connected.

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For dinner Sunday night, I took a cab down to St Kilda’s which is Melbourne’s beach town where I met my cousin Matthew for dinner at Clay Pots.  Matthew is on a year-long internship program and working at a Trapeze Camp.  He’s so adorable and positive and interesting – we had a great dinner and it was so nice to see my little cuz!!

Matthew and our amazing seafood platter

Me & my cousin Matt

So I’m leaving in the morning for Byron Bay…can’t come soon enough!!!

Best almond croissant in Melbourne. Yum.